Saturday, January 31, 2015

Motivating children to do what they need to do without being prompted

Motivate Your Child - A Book Review

Are you Facebook? Do you ever see the memes about What Kind of Parent Are You? I don't what all the answers are because I've never taken one of those quizzes, but I see from my friends that some of the answers are fun, dictator, friend, etc. I already know that the kind of parent I am varies by the day. Sometimes I'm hard, sometimes I give more slack, sometimes I'm inadequate, sometimes I'm insecure, sometimes I'm confident, sometimes I'm gentle and kind in my discipline and others I'm too harsh. I know I'm not alone in all of those. But I love my children just as you love yours and our goal is the same, right? Our goal is to raise our kids to functioning members of society who know right from wrong and make the right choices based on knowing what it is right. And if you are a Christ-follower, like me, then you want your children to love God with all their heart, sharing that love with others. Right? Do we want our children to make choices based on fear or intimidation? Peer pressure? Selfishness? I know I don't. I don't want my kids to behave based on what the external reward or consequence is, typical behavior modification. I want them to be internally motivated, based on what's in their heart, what they know is right.

So when I saw that Motivate Your Child by Dr. Scott Turansky and Joanne Miller, RN, BSN, is a Christian Parent's Guide to Raising Children Who Do What They Need to Do Without Being Told, I knew I had to read it. I thought it would be useful. Who would have thought this would be a book I couldn't put down? It's like a family therapy session that keeps getting better and better, providing tools and discussion points to help guide the reader through correcting your child, preparing them to use better or different behaviors in the future, practicing those scenarios. The tools and techniques help build integrity and encourage taking initiative.

Fairly early in the book, the authors provide a checklist of characteristics so you can identify areas where your child's conscience is already strong or needs improvement. The following four chapters dive into how to improve those areas of your child's conscience, driving their internal motivation behind their behavior. It addresses how to handle the issues of blaming others, lying, not obeying, and so much more. If your children ever get angry or blame others when they do something wrong, this book has great suggestions.

I'm telling you, I just kept underlining and underlining and taking notes on index cards to keep in my purse. When my kids are fighting and blaming each other, now I have other tools. Even while I was reading the book, I started incorporating the suggestions and my kids responded much more favorably, It's a matter of involving them, their heart and conscience, rather than imposing something uncomfortable upon them. Now, this isn't to say that there is never discipline, but rather coupling discipline with heart-training. Sometimes temptations need to be removed. Sometimes children need to be redirected toward stopping what they are doing and following directions rather than repeating the directions over and over again and waiting for the child to respond.

Eventually, a child's behaviors aren't just about his or herself, but about how those behaviors affect others. The family dynamic exists through all the relationships within the family. Internal motivation isn't just about making the right decisions about honesty, tact, lying, or selfishness, but about how our actions affect others and engaging others in what interests them. As parents, we may lose interest in some our child's interests during the teen years. However, "initiating relationship regularly is like adding oil to the machine to reduce friction so tasks are easier to accomplish." (p163) It's our job to tie the relationships together so our family unit functions.

Living through example, incorporating family worship time, reading the bible with your children, and living your faith are some of the ways that our children will develop a strong spiritual motivation internally. Just as being externally motivated through only discipline and rewards will not provide a strong internal conscience, simply telling our kids what to do or believe will not build a strong spiritual foundation. They need to be involved in it to believe it for themselves. Your example sets one layer of foundation, including your children in that examples sets a stronger layer of foundation. If your kids are older and you haven't been building them spiritually, it's not too late to start. Chapter 16 walks the reader through situations of resistance, spiritual warfare, pressing on, and being a Godly influence. The key here is to not be intimidated or give up. God is powerful and His grace is sufficient.

The most important thing, leading our children to Christ and providing good soil for their spiritual growth, is not overlooked in this book. The authors really take the lead in walking parents through this and continuing as their children grow, including how to overcome some obstacles along the way.

As I mentioned previously, Motivate Your Child is like a family therapy program in paperback. I loved the practical explanations and discussion points, how easy it is to make notes and incorporate the suggestions, and I made note cards to carry with me. Thomas Nelson publishing really hit the mark with this book by Turansky and Miller, founders of The National Center for Biblical Parenting. Every Christian parent should have access to a copy of this book. I wish it had been published 10 years ago!

You can order your copy of Motivate Your Child on Amazon or from The National Center for Biblical Parenting. There is a Motivate Your Child Action Plan available as well or you can order the Book and Action Plan Set.

This post contains affiliate links. If you click on or order from these links the author may receive a percentage of your purchase in compensation.
This compensation in now way affected the opinions expressed of the book reviewed.

Monday, January 12, 2015

Motivate Your Child and a Giveaway for YOU

Want to win a Go Pro HERO3+ Silver Camera (value $300)? You'll have your chance below!

You know those moments: when you’ve told the kids that there is an appointment in an hour? You’ve served lunch. You go to finish getting ready and come back to find that no one has eaten. One hasn’t brushed her hair. Another isn’t dressed or has decided to change clothes and can’t find anything to wear. This is not the first time you told them there was an appointment in an hour. Come on already. Wasn’t this discussed last night? How can you lose a shoe? What do you mean you can’t find your toothbrush?

All of a sudden you wonder if you’re going to make it out the door at all. What happened? It seems like I live through this every. single. day.

So, when I read the first page of Motivate Your Child: A Christian Parent’s Guide to Raising Kids Who Do What They Need to Do Without Being Told, I was hooked. I want my kids to be internally motivated to do what they need to do to help our household run smoothly and for them to be helpful, contributing members of society. I want them to think with the big picture in mind and not just in the moment.

I’m excited to read this book and incorporate the principles and ideas into our family.

In a few weeks, I’ll be sharing my review of Motivate Your Child. I hope you’ll come back for it. In the meantime, you can pre-order your copy before January 31, 2015, and receive $150 in Biblical parenting resources FREE from The National Center for Biblical Parenting. Details about that can be found here. Motivate Your Child Pre-Order Promotion.


To celebrate the release of Motivate Your Child: A Christian Parent's Guide to Raising Kids Who Do What They Need to Do Without Being Told,  members of the Launch Team are sharing a wonderful giveaway filled with a Go Pro Camera, $50 Mardel Gift Card, $25 Amazon Gift Card, and book bundles from both the National Center for Biblical Parenting and Thomas Nelson Publishing! Three winners will win prizes with a total value of nearly $800!

  motivate your child giveaway

Here’s what you could win: 

GRAND PRIZE  ($500+ value)

Go Pro HERO3+ Silver Camera ($300 value)

HERO3+ Silver captures gorgeous, professional-quality 1080p60 video and 10MP photos at speeds of up to 10 frames per second. Built-in Wi-Fi enables you to use the GoPro App to control the camera remotely, preview shots and share your favorites on Facebook, Twitter and more. Compatible with all GoPro mounts, you can wear it or attach it to your gear for immersive POV footage of your favorite activities. It’s waterproof to 131’ (40m) and built tough for all of life’s adventures. Combined with stunning low-light performance, high-performance audio and an ultra wide-angle glass lens, HERO3+ Silver makes capturing and sharing your life easier than ever.  

NCBP Book Bundle ($115 value)

The Christian Parenting Handbook  and Companion Guide

Hero Training Camp Children's Curriculum

Thomas Nelson Book Bundle ($90 value):

The Best Yes by Lysa TerKeurst

Desperate by Sarah Mae and Sally Clarkson

All Pro Dad by Mark Merrill

The Passionate Mom by Susan Merrill 


FIRST PRIZE ($165 value)

$50 Mardel Gift Card

NCBP Book Bundle ($115 value)

The Christian Parenting Handbook  and Companion Guide

Hero Training Camp Children's Curriculum


SECOND PRIZE ($115 value)

$25 Amazon Gift Card

Thomas Nelson Book Bundle ($90 value):

The Best Yes by Lysa TerKeurst

Desperate by Sarah Mae and Sally Clarkson

Say Goodbye to Survival Mode by Crystal Paine

All Pro Dad by Mark Merrill

The Passionate Mom by Susan Merrill

To enter, use the Rafflecopter below. Giveaway dates: January 12, 2015 @12:00am ET through January 28, 2015 @ 11:59pm ET

Terms and Conditions: This giveaway is open to U.S. residents only.  Void where prohibited by law. Must be at least 18 years of age. This giveaway is in no away associated with Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, Pinterest, or Amazon. No purchase necessary for entry. Odds are determined by the number of entries. Selected winner will have 48 hours to respond to email notification to claim their prize or another winner will be drawn.  a Rafflecopter giveaway

Monday, January 5, 2015

Pre-Order Motivate Your Child and receive $150 in FREE resources!

I am excited to share with you about a new book I’m reading this month -- Motivate Your Child: A Christian Parent's Guide to Raising Kids Who Do What They Need to Do Without Being Told. Doesn’t that sound amazing? Isn't that what you want for your kids?
$150 preorder

God's Word gives us a better way to parent, one that builds strong internal motivation in children. When parents change the way they parent, kids change the way they live.Motivate Your Child is a practical book that explores a theology of internal motivation and then gives parents real-life solutions to equip their kids for life.

This is the newest book by parenting experts, Dr. Scott Turansky and Joanne Miller, RN, BSN from the National Center for Biblical Parenting (NCBP), also authors of The Christian Parenting Handbook. 

In order to motivate parents to Pre-Order the book, the NCBP is offering a $150 package of resources for FREE! There are video, audio and print items that can be used on a variety of devices. You can learn more on the Book Website.

You can Pre-Order the book now from any retailer, and then follow the instructions below.
Pre-Order from Amazon
Pre-Order from The National Center for Biblical Parenting

INSTRUCTIONS: Purchase the book. Email the receipt to The NCBP will send you the link and a special code to access these downloadable products. This offer is good until January 31, 2015.