Not Me Monday: Peanut butter and swim suits

If you're new to Not Me Monday, MckMama started it in order to humorously admit some of her imperfections and share some moments that happen to most of us, but are rarely talked about. It's funny and enjoyable and I encourage you to read on and then hop over to her site for more Not Me Mondays.

I did not try every single day last week to transfer my pictures from my camera to my computer. In doing so, every time I plugged the camera in, the computer did not fail to recognize my camera. I did not say I would have the first post from our vacation up today and then not be ready because of this small issue with the camera. It is not driving me crazy!

We did not spend Saturday trying to get the house picked up and welcoming for when someone drops by unexpectedly. This is not a huge task, because we always put things in their place and everything has a place to be put (ahem,a little more space would be nice). While moving some things around, I did not find green gum smashed into the carpet, strategically hidden behind a plant. My kids would never do this because they know gum always goes in the trash when they are finished chewing it. Further, they would never sneak gum and then feel the need to hide it to avoid being caught. Nope, not my kids. They are much more obedient than that. *

I did not also find peanut butter smeared at the base of the bathroom door. My kids always eat in the kitchen or dining room and don't carry food around the house. They certainly know better than to smear peanut butter somewhere other than bread! *

And finally, we did not have a graduation party to go to Sunday evening at a local water park that the kids have just been dying to go to. When it was time to go, I did not look in the bag of swimming essentials and ask Child B where her swimming suit was. No, I hadn't told her several times already to put it in the bag. She did not finally go look for it, as we should be walking out the door. She did not find the top and bottom in two different rooms. We did not get the party and only find the top piece in the bag and have to go back home for the bottom half. We did not find it in her bedroom doorway.

That's it for this week. To find out what others aren't up to, hop on over to MckMama's for more Not Me Mondays.

Hopefully my camera and computer will cooperate very soon and I can get my vacation posts up.

* Chances are good that the culprit in these incidents is 4-year old Child C. Sweetheart that she is, don't underestimate her ability to be devious.

Not Me Monday: Busy-ness, sunburn, and how I peed my pants

This week I'm participating again in MckMama's Not Me Monday, where I can admit some of my imperfections, or deny them, as I see fit.

We've been pretty busy lately planning a long trip, taking said long trip, unpacking, finishing up softball season, generally trying to clean up the house, avoiding bad storms, dealing with bad storms, limiting laundry to when we are home since I'm hyper-aware of dryers catching on fire, and all the normal busy-ness of life. So, is it any surprise that sometimes I wash a load of laundry and forget the laundry soap? No, I wouldn't do that. And even if I did, I wouldn't just toss the load in the dryer anyway without re-washing it, would I? Not me!

When making chicken and dumplings recently, I wouldn't have cooked all the vegetables in homemade chicken stock, dropped in the dumplings, and then realized I never added the chicken. Nope. After all, it's chicken and dumplings, isn't it? Not me. I would never forget such an essential ingredient and then served it anyway.

I didn't forget to pick up my Vitamin-D prescription on Wednesday, Thursday, AND Friday when I know that it's a once a week prescription and I take it on Fridays. Then on Saturday, I didn't fill the day with outside activities and sunburn myself to a crisp because I NEEDED the Vitamin-D. Nope. Not when it would just take a 15 minute run to the pharmacy. Not me. I wouldn't put myself through so much discomfort because I'm forgetful. Now it won't take me 2 weeks to get back on track taking it on Fridays because I finally picked it up and took it on Sunday. (Next week I can take it on Saturday and then the following week I can take it on Friday, getting me back on schedule.)

And finally, when traveling on our trip, my oldest daughter didn't say something hilariously rude to a complete stranger (who egged her on a tad bit). I did not laugh so hard that I did not really pee my pants. Nope. Not her and not me. She minds her manners under all circumstances and I certainly have complete control of my bladder! I did not dash to the bathroom and then send my youngest daughter out to ask my husband to get a clean pair of pants out of the van for me. Not me!

To read about what others aren't doing, hop on over to MckMama's.

Come back later in the week for some blogging about our trip and a rather awkward conversation with a stranger at a local buffet today that left me wondering "Why?"

Not Me Monday: mayo, stitches, and lost child

It's been a FULL week and I'm not very excited to share it. It was more eventful than I like, but here goes.

A little over a week ago, we spent a couple nights in a hotel in Peoria, Illinois. It was a great trip and we saw over 80 bald eagles near the Illinois River (the whole purpose of the trip), but the chlorine in the hotel's pool bleached our swimming suites, burned the kids eyes and skin, and turned their beautiful blonde hair into sticks! It took 3 full bottles of hotel shampoo to get their hair to feel like I could condition it and then 5 bottles of hotel conditioner to be able to brush it (I was glopping it on as I was brushing!) I have left a message at the front desk and over the phone for the manager and have yet to hear back... The rest of the hotel stay was great, though!

So, upon returning home, trying to brush my daughters' hair was again a challenge, as it still was not yet back to normal. As I was spraying olive oil onto Child B, I called my hairdresser to find out her opinion. She suggested mayonnaise. Yep. The sandwich kind. One of my daughters cannot stand mayo. Not. one. bit. So, of course, I did not put it in her hair. Nope. Not me. I didn't put her in the shower and wash her hair well, brush it and slather the mayo on real thick before wrapping it in a towel for 3 hours. I wouldn't do that to her, especially not with her gagging while I was doing it. Then when her older sister was in the shower and taunting her, I didn't ask if I could have a piec eof bread and tomatoes because she smelled SO good! Further, I wouldn't tell her that it was all a joke and she was going to be the only one to have to do this. Nope, I wouldn't tease my own daughter like that. (I did then go on to tell that I was teasing and yes her sister would also really have to have mayo in her hair!)

Child B, not very happy about having mayo in her hair:

I did not continue to make mayonnaise jokes all day long.

Later that night, when hubby came home from, he didn't say that dinner smelled delicious and ask if there was mayonnaise in it, giving his middle daughter a teasing look.

Tuesday was Child B's birthday - the BIG 7! We went to Bible Study in the morning, as usual for Tuesdays. My group was appropriately interrupted because Child C fell and busted her chin open again (just a little above where she did it on April Fools Day last year.) I had awful flashbacks of her very painful and scary experience getting stitches. But we left quickly and dropped A and B off with a neighbor and I headed to the local urgent care with C. Having forgotten to take pictures last time, I did not keep telling myself over and over again, "Take a picture when we get there. Take a picture when we get there."

Before (it held closed nicely!):

This one wasn't as bad as last time and closed together nicely, so they were able to glue it. Yeah! (Check back in a day or two for how this was a clear answer to prayer!!!)

After (with glue):

Today, we did not go to our homeschool group's Valentine's Bowling Party. Not the day after Valentine's Day. That doesn't make sense. While there, I did not let C slide around on the floor while watching her ball, that she rolled, barely make it down the lane.

And even if I would have, I wouldn't have let her sister, B, go to the bathroom unattended. The bathroom is RIGHT by the lane we were bowling on and right next to the party room we were in. So, of course, I would feel the need to go with her, lugging 4 yo C with me. Right? So after 15 minutes of her not emerging from the bathroom, I went looking for her and really, seriously did not find her. Not in the bathroom, not in the hall, not outside, not in the bar (where we had to go get cups earlier), not out the other door, not anywhere. Remember, I had not seen her for 15 minutes! When A told the lady at the register/shoe checkout that her sister was missing, she replied "OK." WHAT?!? So, I asked her specifically to page her, while several parents are looking and a boy was sent into the men's room to look. Still not anywhere. So, I did not resort to my mother's instinct to locate my lost daughter at all cost and call 911. (She has had a tendency to wander off in the past and the bowling alley was not rented out to our group exclusively, so two factors there that I thought justified this phone call.) Just as I was confirming my daughter's description and they were about to dispatch an officer, someone came up and told me B was in the other bathroom. I had no idea there was another bathroom - on the other end of the bowling alley(and the lady who works there didn't ask me if I had checked both bathrooms!) Yeah. Daughter found. Call canceled. (Isn't it great that they confirm, "So you no longer need an officer to respond to this call?") Next time I know to scope out all the bathrooms! And maybe really not let her go unattended. Or at least make sure she is in the one RIGHT next to us.

If you want to read about what other's aren't doing, head on over to MckMama's for Not Me Monday! (Most of them are funnier than this one. But it was cathartic to get it out!)

Not Me Monday: cheese crackers

My children always sit at the table and have a snack. They certainly do NOT sneak their snack over to the couch and play with it. Nope. I would never allow my children to put their food in between their toes. Not me! But I guess if they did, it would be OK because my children would never go more than a few days without a bath. I wouldn't let them go long enough for their toenails to be visibly dirty. Not me! And even if I did, I certainly wouldn't let them eat anything that had been between their toes. Really, who knows when those toes were last washed?

If you're curious about what other moms aren't doing, or would simply like some light-hearted humor, head on over to MckMama's for Not Me Monday!

Not Me Monday!

I didn’t make my kids a smoothie with fresh fruits, organic milk and yogurt, and flax meal, sneaking in spinach, too, and then ask them if we should try adding spinach one of these days. Nope, not me. I wouldn’t ask them if we should do something I already did.

While we weren’t at Kiddie Land this weekend, I didn’t go skyscrapers high with 2 of my kids to go on a raft ride. While up there, I didn’t listen to a tween boy review the two different tubes of the ride, after he’d proclaimed to ride each one at least 30 times. I didn’t then proceed to tell the same tween boy behind us in line that the only reason you can see light partway down in the pitch black tube is because the ride is so old it’s falling apart. Those are the cracks where it’s breaking. That’s why Kiddie Land is closing this year. (I did, however, tell him I was just messing with him when he had a look of horror on his face.)

While shopping at Target the other day, there were 7 carts inside the front door of the store. They were in 3 groups: 2 groups of 2 carts and 1 group of 3 carts. The carts were each stuck to another cart and I couldn’t for the life of me get them separated. With my own 3 kids in tow, plus a neighbor girl, I didn’t load everyone up with a basket and tell them they all get to help carry the groceries. Nope. I wouldn’t make the children all help out and actually carry the groceries. Not me.

To find out what other mom's aren't doing, hop on over to MckMama's blog. She has a great Not Me Monday carnival and it's funny to read about others, be able to be brutally honest, and not feel a bit ton of guilt about it. We are all human and take shortcuts, make fun, and sometimes just get by. It's OK and it's great to share!

Check back Thursday for a [long and amusing, but] simple suggestion about using Ebay and a super easy, very tasty recipe for Apple Crisp!